


Lemon and Honey

by moxyphinx



Category: NCIS
Genre: Coffee, F/F, Slow-Burn Jack x Ellie, not much more, pretty fluffy, why do all my Jack ships involve coffee?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-19
Packaged: 2021-02-22 09:29:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22713877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moxyphinx/pseuds/moxyphinx
Summary: Bishop and Sloane share some dark thoughts with each other.
Relationships: Ellie Bishop/Jacqueline "Jack" Sloane
Comments: 4
Kudos: 28





	1. A Cup of Tea

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SpookyStar29](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpookyStar29/gifts).



> Disclaimer: I do not own the NCIS characters or any NCIS plot lines referenced in this fic. However, the new ideas created are all mine.

Ellie fidgeted impatiently at her desk, filling out the last of the day’s case report. The news Gibbs had given her and the team earlier in the week was sticking with her uncomfortably. She knew he didn’t want to talk about it and the team had sworn not to discuss it in front of him. Truth be told, Ellie was taking it harder than anyone. She was no stranger to the loss of a loved one— Qasim had been gone for two years now, but the pain of his death still remained. A dull ache lingered in her heart every time she thought about the future that had awaited them. She didn’t know if she could get through it if she lost another teammate. McGee had been like a brother, Torres was her best friend, and Gibbs was like a second father to her. And Jack... she didn’t know how to describe their relationship. They were friends, sure. But they weren’t quite close enough for secrets like the ones she shared with Nick. The mood was dark when she and Nick would speak in hushed voices in his living room as the fireplace slowly dimmed and the night grew. She talked to Jack about personal things, sure, but almost every conversation that took place in Jack’s office was work-related.

She sighed, saving the document she was working on and stood after shutting down her computer. She hoped Jack hadn’t left early. It was a Friday evening and work had been light that day, there was a good chance the psychologist had already gone home. She gathered her things and piled them in her bag. She slung it over her shoulder and made her way to the stairs. 

“Heading out, Bishop?” McGee called from his desk, where he remained as he finished his reports. 

“Going to see if Sloane’s still in, but I’ll be out of here soon,” she answered. 

“Have a good evening.” 

“You too,” she called from halfway up the stairs. Ellie slipped quietly down the hall, pausing in front of Sloane’s office. She knocked softly at the closed door, hoping Jack would still be in her office. 

She heard a muffled “Come in,” from inside and turned the handle, stepping into the simple gray room. Her eyes skimmed the room, noticing the mess of folders scattered on the table by the couch. Jack must have had a busier day than she had. 

“You got a second?” Ellie asked.

“For you? Always!” Jack answered, looking up from her computer and removing her glasses. 

Ellie walked hesitantly over to her desk, standing in front of the blonde. “I was going to ask you something, but maybe that should be a conversation for another time,”

“If you’re sure— I’m here to listen if you need me.” 

“You look like you had a much busier day than I did.” 

“Oh, tell me about it,” she sighed exasperatedly. “You guys just wrapped up a big case, but one of the other teams caught one with more potential suspects than I could count on my fingers! After analyzing their profiles and confirming alibis, we have it narrowed down to four, but it was a long day for sure.” 

“Don’t think we’ve ever had that many suspects all in one case before,” Ellie commented. 

“There was a lot of DNA at the crime scene— a barber shop, of all places! Someone did a full on Sweeney Todd on one of the customers.” 

Ellie wrinkled her nose at the thought. “Let me guess. The hair of everyone who had a trim that day?” 

Jack hummed in agreement. “Took Kasie forever to separate all the DNA samples we got. I’m about to head out for the night though.” 

“Want some help cleaning up?” the younger agent offered. 

“Sure, if you don’t mind.” 

“Oh, not at all!” Ellie started over to the clutter on the table and began sorting through profiles, putting the papers back in their proper folders. The psychologist joined her after tidying her desk and the two women made short work of organizing the remaining files. 

“Thanks for your help!” Jack smiled warmly. “You know, it gets pretty lonely up here sometimes.” 

Ellie returned the smile, “Anytime!” She stood up, brushing her palms down the front of her jeans. “Hey, I meant to ask when I first got here, but you looked busy...” 

“Go ahead. Not busy anymore,” the older woman chuckled. 

“It’s a Friday night. We usually go to dinner— me, Torres and McGee,” she began. “But McGee is spending the evening with the kids and Delilah, and Nick apparently has a date. I came up to ask if you wanted to go out for drinks, since the rest of the team is out of commission?” 

“Sure! I don’t have anything going on tonight besides my plans to curl up with a book,” Jack answered enthusiastically. “Let me get my things and I’ll be right down.” 

“Great! See you downstairs in a few!” Ellie turned and headed back to the elevator. 

———————————————————————————————————

When the two entered the dimly lit bar, Jack caught the eye of the bartender. 

“Usual?” he called. 

“Please!” she answered. Turning to Ellie, she murmured “What do you want? First round on me.” 

“Oh really, it’s no trouble, I can pay my own way—“ 

“Nonsense!” she turned back to the bartender, “Make it two, please!” 

“You got it, Jack!” 

A few moments later, they were seated at the corner of the bar in the back of the room, each with a gin and tonic in front of them. “Come here often, Jack?” Ellie asked with a raised eyebrow. 

“Oh, every now and then,” she answered, smiling half-heartedly. 

“Ah, I see,” Ellie smirked. “When you need a pick-me-up?” 

“Something like that,” Jack sighed. 

“Seems like you had a busy afternoon, huh?” “Oh, the usual. Delving into old case files involving any of our suspects today. Making connections, analyzing potential suspects,” 

“Busier than I was,” Ellie commented. “We haven’t caught a case since we got that guy from the bowling alley,” 

“That was a rough one on Gibbs— On all of us, really,” she paused. “Especially given his latest team talk in the elevator,” 

“That certainly didn’t help manners,” 

“Believe me, I was the same way when I heard,” 

“What, shocked and nervous, almost losing faith in your superior?” 

“Well, it had been under different circumstances when he told me, so I—“ 

“And your first reaction wasn’t to question every moral you had?” Ellie asked incredulously. 

“Hey, it wasn’t like that—“ 

“Then what was it, Jack? Why—“ 

“Ellie, listen to me,” the younger blonde’s lip quivered, tears threatening to spill over. “Remember how I had a bar fight with the asshole who took out my team in Afghanistan? I know how Gibbs feels, that’s why I could understand him. Gibbs thought he was doing what was right... As a father and a husband. Just like I thought I was doing right by avenging my team,” she finished gently. 

“I don’t understand why I don’t trust him anymore,” Ellie whispered in a shaking voice. 

“Hey, Ellie,” the older woman said quietly. “Look at me.” She glanced up, her tear-filled stare meeting Jack’s warm gaze. “I don’t really want to have the rest of this conversation here, and I doubt you really want to end up crying in a bar tonight,” she put her arm around the younger agent’s shoulder. “Let’s get you home.” 

“I don’t want to go home yet,” Ellie murmured bitterly. 

“Okay, well how about we go back to my place,” Jack began slowly. “We can have coffee or tea. Unwind a little bit. We don’t need to be discussing these things while we’re drinking the stronger stuff.” Ellie nodded her agreement and downed the rest of her drink. 

Soon after, the two were in Jack’s house, Ellie resting her head on the back of the couch with a blanket and a steaming mug of green tea. Jack made her way slowly back into the room with her cup of coffee before settling down next to Ellie. The younger blonde was staring at the wall, lost in her thoughts. 

“You there, Bishop?” Jack asked gently, pulling the woman from the depths of her mind. 

Ellie nodded wordlessly, breaking eye contact with the wall and meeting Jack’s discerning gaze. “Don’t try to psychoanalyze me,” she muttered quietly. 

“I try not to do that to my friends,” was the murmured reply. 

“You’re not doing a very good job of hiding it right now,” Ellie snapped. 

“Hey, I just want to know what’s on your mind,” Jack’s tone was soft compared to the younger agent’s bitterness. “You’ve hardly spoken a word since we got back and I can see that something’s troubling you. Don’t need a psychologist to tell me that— it’s all over your face.” 

Ellie’s lip started trembling again with the beginnings of tears forming in her eyes. “What was it like?” she whispered, the liquid thoughts making their way down her cheeks. “What was it like when Gibbs told you? I need to know how it felt.” 

“Ellie, before I tell you, you need to understand that the circumstances were different when I found out,” she warned. 

“I don’t care what the circumstances were. I just want to be able to trust him again,” her voice swayed on the last phrase, tears flowing swiftly down her face. 

“Gibbs and I...” Jack started before trailing off, unsure of where to begin. “We are both damaged people. We’ve been through a lot. We both served in our younger days. We’ve seen some stuff that no one should have to witness. He lost his entire life when his wife and daughter were killed. That was all he had left to fight for and they were taken from him. He thought that revenge would ease the pain,” she broke off, nervous for Ellie’s reaction to her next statement. “When I served in the army, I was on a team of three psychologists and a trained assassin. We were on a mission and Sargent Anshimi, the assassin, was the first to go. He disappeared in the middle of the night and my team and I were captured the next day,” she swallowed hard. “We were so afraid he had betrayed us. We didn’t want to believe it, but the chain of events were just too coincidental.”

“Did he?” Ellie breathed.

“We never found out. He was killed before we could locate him.”

“I’m sorry, Jack,” the younger agent murmured.

“What’s done is done. The people who captured us tried to torture us for information, but nobody broke. After a few weeks, they started threatening to kill one of us.”

Ellie drew in a sharp breath.

“I was told I had to be the one to choose which of my teammates would die and who would survive,” she continued. “Hale and King both told me to pick themselves. They were both willing to sacrifice their lives to save the other. They were reassuring me the whole time, telling me it was okay,” tears began welling up in the older woman’s eyes. “I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t choose. I didn’t want either of them to die for me,” she let the tears fall, her voice giving out. “He shot them both point-blank,” she rasped. 

“Oh, Jack...” Ellie set her mug down on the table, moving to envelop Jack in her arms. “It wasn’t your fault— there was nothing you could have done,” she whispered.

“Do you see it now, Ellie?” Jack asked, her voice trembling through tears. “I understood Gibbs when he confessed his actions because I wanted to kill Hakim when I saw him in that bar last year. I knew what he went through with his wife and daughter.” 

“Jack...” Ellie trailed off, lost for words. She felt Jack’s tremors from within her embrace. “I am so sorry you had to go through all of that. And now I feel even worse for snapping earlier over he whole Gibbs thing.”

“You understand now?” Jack whispered.

“I do,” came the soft reply. Ellie gently released her friend as Jack reached for a tissue. She dabbed at the tears lingering on her cheeks and wiped at the mascara that had begun to smear at the corners of her eyes. 

“I’m sorry,” Jack murmured, sniffing.

“Jack, you have nothing to be sorry for! I’m sorry I got angry earlier, I had no idea you went through all that.”

“You shouldn’t have to see me like this,” the older agent muttered.

“That’s what friends are for, Jack. We lift each other up in times of need,” Ellie answered earnestly.

“Thank you.”

“Of course! I don’t mind listening when people need to talk. I know that’s usually your job, but even the psychologist needs an emotional vent every now and then.”

“Hey, Ellie?”

“Yeah?”

“Please don’t tell anyone what I told you,” Jack pleaded. “You, Gibbs, and Leon are the only ones that know. I... I just don’t think I’m ready for the rest of the team to find out. I don’t want them to see me any differently knowing what I’ve been through.”

“This is your private business, I wouldn’t share it with anyone! Besides, it’s a part of who you are. You wouldn’t be any different with or without them knowing.”

“I know, I just don’t want them to feel sorry for me.”

“They would understand, I’m sure. But if you don’t want that information out there, I won’t tell a soul.” Ellie assured. 

“Hey, I feel like we came back here to get you out of that bar, not to talk about my problems,” Jack stated. “Is there anything you want to talk about?”

Ellie’s mind whirled. There were so many things she wanted to talk about with Jacqueline Sloane, but at that moment, given what had just passed between the two women, she looked up at the honey-blonde woman and shrugged. “I don’t really want to talk about the Gibbs thing anymore,” she was trying to distract herself from the toughness of the situation. She wanted to lighten the mood, but she was at a loss for what to discuss. 

“Thank God,” Jack laughed.

Ellie took a long sip of her tea, relishing in its sweetness. The heat of the drink as it warmed her body was reflected in Jack’s eyes, warm and welcoming. She set her mug down on the coffee table and hugged the blanket closer as a chill swept through the room.

“Cold?” 

“Just a bit,” Ellie laughed.

“Why don’t we put a movie on?” Jack suggested. “It’ll take our minds off things.”

“That sounds like a great idea,” Ellie opened her cocoon to allow Jack space. The other agent snuggled in, remote in hand, and soon the movie had become background noise to Ellie as she felt herself getting drowsy. 

Jack looked over at the younger agent and smiled. It had been quite some time since she’d had a house guest. Tomorrow was the weekend, so it wouldn’t hurt to let loose and sleep in the next day. She debated on suggesting the guest room for Ellie, but she thought it would be best not to wake her at this point. Jack knew her muscles would complain in the morning if she fell asleep, so she gently extracted herself from Ellie’s blanket hug and tucked the fleece back in, quietly making her way up to her own room. She changed into pajamas, trying to maintain the silence so as not to wake the sleeping blonde downstairs. She felt her eyes getting heavy as soon as she climbed into bed. She uttered a soft sigh as the warmth of her comforter settled in and she was asleep within minutes.


	2. Sickeningly Sweet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack makes coffee.

Ellie yawned sleepily, the smell of coffee permeating her nostrils. She opened her eyes, confused at the pale white ceiling above her. She was tangled in a soft fleece blanket the color of the sea. She rolled over to check the time on her phone and nearly fell off the couch.

8:29 AM.

The couch.

Jack’s couch.

She couldn’t believe she had managed to pass out during the movie and fall asleep on the other agent’s couch. She yawned again, blinking the sleep from her eyes. 

“Good morning, sleepyhead,” a voice sounded from the doorway.

Ellie jumped slightly, turning her head to see Jack leaning against the wall, coffee in hand, smirking slightly at Ellie’s drowsiness. 

“Did I really sleep through the whole movie?” Ellie asked, rubbing her eyes. 

“Mhmm,” Jack laughed. “The whole thing. And through the rest of the night, by the looks of it.”

Ellie blushed as she realized the state of disarray she was in after sleeping on the other agent’s couch. Her hair had fallen from last night’s ponytail and now lay in a mess at the base of her neck, her hair tie hanging loosely around the ends.

“Coffee?” 

“Please,” Ellie sat up and swiftly pulled the fleece blanket off. The cool air hit her and she shivered as she stood slowly, stretching her legs. She combed her fingers through her hair, hoping to make herself appear less disheveled. 

“The pot’s still warm.”

“Thanks,” Ellie smiled gratefully as she made her way slowly into the kitchen. An empty mug was waiting for her next to the half-full pot of steaming beverage. She poured herself a serving and scooped a heaping spoonful or sugar into the mug, stirring it gently.

“A girl after my own heart, I see,” Jack’s voice sounded behind her as she turned around, blushing.

“What?”

Jack nodded to Ellie’s cup of coffee. “Lots of sugar in your coffee. Me too,” she raised her own mug.

“Oh,” Ellie looked back down, concentrating hard on pouring the right amount of cream into the drink. “Yeah. I like it sweet I guess.”

“Something bothering you?”

“I—“ Ellie brought the mug to her lips, blowing softly to cool the beverage. “Nothing.”

“If you’re sure,” Jack raised an eyebrow skeptically.

“Thanks for the coffee,” Ellie mumbled. “And for letting me crash here last night. Sorry I fell asleep on the couch.”

“Oh, it’s no problem at all!” Jack answered simply. “I would have offered you the guest room, but you looked peaceful. I didn’t want to wake you.”

“Thanks,” Ellie smiled gratefully, taking a sip of her scalding coffee, hardly caring that it burned slightly as the hot beverage touched her tongue. She stared out the window, as the morning light filtered in, casting shadows on the tiled floor. She still couldn’t believe she’d managed to fall asleep on Jack’s couch. She was used to crashing at Nick’s place – or even at Gibbs’ house after a particularly rough case. But with Jack? This was new for her. She thought back to the conversation she and Agent Sloane had had the previous night. Maybe it was a good thing she hadn’t gone home alone.

“Earth to Bishop,” Jack’s voice jolted her from her mind. “Did you hear me?”

“What? Oh, sorry, Jack...” she trailed off nervously.

“I asked if you were hungry. I was going to make eggs if you wanted any.”

“Oh... yeah, eggs would be great.” Ellie mumbled.

“Fried okay?” 

Ellie nodded in agreement.

“You seem at a loss for words this morning. You sure everything’s okay?” the older agent asked gently.

“I think I just slept funny,” she began. “Not used to being somewhere but my own bed I guess.”

“Oh, well next time you can have the guest room. It’s always made up if you need it.”

Next time.

Jacqueline Sloane had just implied that Ellie would be invited over another time for late night drinks or chats or whatever might prompt her to stay the night. 

Ellie found herself smiling at the idea before Jack’s voice interrupted her thoughts again.

“Is that okay with you?”

“Yeah. Of course!” Ellie brightened a bit, taking another sip of her still-steaming coffee.

“The offer isn’t just for when you’re having a rough time,” Jack paused, her brown eyes meeting Ellie’s with a startling intensity. “You’re always welcome here whenever you need a break.”

Ellie’s smile quickly returned as she murmured her thanks, tearing her gaze away from the older woman and blushing again. She continued taking small sips  
of her coffee as she felt its warmth encompass her insides. 

Jack busied herself with breakfast preparations, starting to melt a small slice of butter in a saucepan as she cracked two eggs into a bowl. 

Ellie sat at the round table in the corner of the kitchen, humming absent-mindedly to herself as the aroma of Jack’s cooking made its way into her senses. 

“Cheese or no cheese?” Jack called from where the eggs were sizzling on the stove. 

“Yes, please!”

Jack laughed at her enthusiastic tone, sprinkling a generous amount of shredded cheese onto the fried eggs before flipping them over. 

Ellie’s stomach growled and she suddenly realized how hungry she was, having not eaten a proper dinner the night before.

“Almost there,” Jack laughed, having heard her involuntary complaint.

Sure enough, two plates of steaming eggs rested on the table in front of the two women.

“Bon Appetit!”

The two of them finished their breakfast quickly and Ellie offered to wash up.

“You don’t need to do that, you’re a guest in my home,” Jack protested.

“Please, it’s the least I can do to thank you.”

Jack reluctantly gave in, downing the remainder of her coffee as the younger agent ran the dished under hot water and soap. When she was finished, Ellie returned to the table, cradling her still-warm mug in her hands.

“Is it always this cold in here?” 

“I can turn down the A/C if you’d like,” Jack thought about opening the window for fresh air. It was a warm spring morning, but she worried the humidity would make the room too muggy for her liking. 

“No, no— I’m fine. I was just making an observation. My apartment’s usually warmer than this.”

“That’s the Oklahoma blood in you,” Jack winked.

Ellie blushed again. “I suppose so. And the Californian in you requires you to freeze your house guests?” 

This caused Jack to laugh out loud. “You know, Gibbs said the same thing last time he—“ she broke off suddenly, afraid she had revealed too much to the younger agent. “Gibbs’ house is cold too.”

The dismay could be seen on Ellie’s face as the older agent’s words resonated in her mind. Jack and Gibbs? She had heard the rumors, but the two of them had always dismissed any ideas the rest of the team had. 

Jack and Gibbs.

Gibbs had stayed over at Jack’s house.

Suddenly, Ellie didn’t feel quite as special. She was foolish to believe that Jack had given her special treatment because they shared an emotional breakdown on her couch last night. It hadn’t meant a thing. Jack was a psychologist— It was her job to help lost souls like Ellie.

A long silence passed between the two women. Ellie desperately wanted to ask Jack if she and Gibbs had spent many nights on her couch like the one she had had last night. She wanted to know if they had just spoken or if it had been more. She wanted...

She didn’t know what she wanted. She wasn’t one to gloat over office gossip, but she also wasn’t one to let her feelings get in the way of an interaction between friends. 

Jack sighed in defeat. “I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m sorry,”

“What are you sorry for? I’m not bothered,” Ellie’s facial expression showed the contrary.

“I can see it upset you, Ellie. I shouldn’t have said it,” the older woman paused. “Me and Gibbs... There’s nothing going on between us.”

“You want to rephrase that statement, Jack?” Ellie raised her eyebrow.

“Not anymore. There’s no longer anything going on between us.”

“What made you stop? The whole office is convinced you’re the one who’s got him so touchy whenever someone mentions romance.”

“We’re both wounded individuals, Ellie. You have to understand that.”

“We’ve been over this already, Jack,” Ellie reminded her of their conversation from the previous evening.

“When he lost Shannon and Kelly, a gaping hole formed in his heart. I can’t fill it. I knew from the moment we started that it wouldn’t last,” she inhaled deeply. “I didn’t want to replace his beloved, but he believed no one could ever fully occupy that space.”

Ellie felt her cheeks burning, tears beginning to form in her eyes as she heard Jack talk about her feelings for the man who had once been like a second father to her. She stared up at the ceiling for a moment, willing the tears not to spill over. She refused to let them fall. She didn’t want the other woman to know how much those words had pained her.

Ellie sipped the last bit of her coffee, the sugar that had collected at the bottom of passed her lips with almost a sickening sweetness.

_Jack takes her coffee sickeningly sweet._

“I should probably get going,” she stood up, setting her mug gently on the counter next to the sink. “Thank you for letting me stay the night— And for breakfast,” she attempted to lighten the atmosphere with a cheery tone.

_Jack takes her coffee sickeningly sweet._

She licked her lips nervously, tasting the lingering sugary flavor. She forced herself out of her thoughts as Jack rinsed out their mugs, drying them with a small hand towel.

Ellie started back towards the living room, where her coat was draped unceremoniously over a chair. She put it on and picked up her phone, hastily grabbing her phone from the side table. She headed towards the door, keys in hand.

“Ellie, wait!”

Ellie turned hopefully, meeting the other woman’s chocolate gaze.

“You’re welcome.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I still don’t own the characters :)


End file.
